A Broken Melody
by Melody123
Summary: When music fills the Varia Castle, everyone is intrigued! I mean, what type of bad-ass assassin plays an instrument? XS shouenen-ai, swearing... enjoy!
1. Melody

A/N: I look back on this fic, and as much as I try, Xanxy-chan-sama is still OOC. Meh, I hope all you readers excuse it! **And MASSIVE thanks to Irrelevancy who beta-d for me! Her comments could not have been more useful ;) **

* * *

**A Broken Melody**

A soft melody filled the Varia castle, a melody which stopped the Varia assassins in their tracks. The notes floated, magically traversing through bluestone walls and thick 'Xanxus-proof' doors. It could be heard over Xanxus's yelling at Levi, and Lussuria's overly loud sobbing at some TV soap or another. It even could be heard over Bel's blaring heavy metal on the radio.

It wove a spell through the inhabitants of the castle until all movement stopped. Everyone was frozen, just listening to the lilting melody. Then a jarring note broke the spell causing a simultaneous flinch. There was a pause, whilst their brains digested the implications of this music. Almost as one, everyone rushed towards the origin of the beautiful melody; the ball room.

Lussuria reached the ball room first, where his jaw dropped open at what he saw. As Xanxus arrived, he stopped dead in his tracks. Levi stared, Bel grinned. Even Fran raised a thin eyebrow at what he saw.

Superbi Squalo, 2nd in command of the universally feared Varia was half naked, scars bare for all to see. His famed silver hair hung like a fluid curtain, hiding his slightly bowed head. It flowed over his back, reaching well past his hips. Both his mechanical and long, slim fingers danced gracefully over the keys of the enormous concert grand piano in the middle of the empty ball room.

His sword rested in its sheath on the floor behind him, along with the detritus of leather arm guards, bindings and a crash mat, telling his audience what he had been doing before. Squalo always trained with no shirt, claiming it restricted his range of movement. The commonly held opinion of the rest of the Varia was he liked to show off his superior abs. Bel claimed that Squalo was a closet exhibitionist.

Squalo's hands reached slowly up the keyboard, eventually sounding the last lingering note. Lussuria broke in spontaneous applause, and Bel laughed. Xanxus just scowled his 'in-thought-do-not-disturb" scowl.

Squalo spun around so quickly he almost fell off the other side of the piano stool. His eyes widened, and his mouth hardened into a murderous expression. All his audience knew what was coming next, and the clever ones covered their ears in anticipation.

"VOOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!"

Squalo's scream of shock/anger/murderous intent shook the walls, and the shockwave sent Lussuria flying down the corridor. As it was, Xanxus had to grab hold of the door-frame to prevent him from staggering back into Levi, something he didn't want under _any_ _circumstances._

"What the _hell_ do you lot think you are doing?" Squalo growled, his initial shock wearing off.

"Squa-chan! We had _no idea_ you could play the piano, let alone so beautifully!" The others could practically see the sparkly-butterfly-shoujo-background behind Lussuria's head.

"Yeah so? You lot don't know everything about me" Squalo paused and muttered something that sounded suspiciously like "I don't want you to"

He continued "I play the piano. Get over it"

"But the Prince thinks that piece you were playing was sufficient for Royalty to listen to again" Heads turned in Bel's direction displaying open-mouthed shock. That was about as close as you could come to a compliment from the psychotic Prince.

"VOII! Would you all just piss off?" Squalo looked frazzled, and slightly scary. More scary than normal.

"Trash, you never told me you could play the pianola… or whatever that thing is." Xanxus's voice cut through the air like a knife, spreading almost-visible icicles with every word.

"ARGH I GIVE UP" and with that, Squalo stood up and stormed off, shoving past his impromptu audience, taking great care to elbow Levi in the gut on the way past.

* * *

Squalo was summoned to Xanxus's office one morning a few days later. He came cautiously, not having spoken to his boss since the piano incident. It was now a forbidden topic in the Varia castle, since Squalo beat the ever-living crap out of Lussuria for mentioning it at breakfast the next day.

Squalo put his hand up to the door and gave a slight knock. He did not feel like washing wine out of his hair today. It was hell to get the crimson colour out, not to mention the damage done by broken glass.

"Trash, is that you?" Xanxus sounded surprisingly pleasant.

_This is strange._ Squalo was pretty sure his boss was pissed with him. The boss did not tolerate his underlings having tantrums well.

He cautiously pushed open the door, immediately flinching in expectation of a wine glass or crystal tumbler thrown at his head. Nothing came. Squalo opened his eyes, and looked wildly around to try to locate his boss.

He found him sitting at his normal place behind his enormous mahogany desk, nursing a large glass of wine.

"Ahhh Boss. What is it?"

"How long have you been playing the piano?" The question came calmly and politely, with a mild expression of interest.

Squalo searched his boss's face for traces for impending doom. He could find nothing but genuine interest.

"I've been playing since I was a child, probably about 5."

"Why don't you play more often?" The question came softly.

Squalo was getting a very weirded out by this 'nice' version of his normally caustic boss. He couldn't help but thinking what horrible task his boss wanted him to do that required this much buttering up.

"Well it's not very bad-ass, is it? I don't need it to be a swordsman and I don't need it to effectively kill people. It's not particularly useful for anything. I haven't played for years. Voii I won't do it again boss, you can count on that"

Just then there was a knock at the door, and Xanxus looked up expectantly. Squalo watched open-mouthed as a large upright piano was carried into the room by 2 deliverymen, and placed in an alcove behind the door.

"Teach me"

* * *

Those two words almost caused Squalo to keel over. As it was he gaped at Xanxus like a fish out of water for a few moments. A few moments too long.

"You don't want to teach me, trash?" Xanxus's previously pleasant demeanour evaporated and his tone became cold.

_Crap, I've done it now. Dug a seven foot hole and buried myself in it. Might as well build myself a friggen coffin. Wonderful."_

Squalo held up his hands in a placating manner. "No! No, I would be happy to teach you piano boss."

Squalo thought for a moment. The idea of Xanxus having the patience to learn something that didn't take 3 minutes of concentration on one concept was difficult to image.

"Just boss, you do realise this isn't….ah…. exactly easy skill to learn"

"TRASH ARE YOU INSUATING THAT I AM UNCAPABLE OF LEARNING?" Xanxus roared his face a murderous shade of purple.

"Voiii no! That's not what I meant!" Squalo shouted "I meant…. It takes a long time. Its one thing I can't speed up for you."

"I know that you useless piece of refuse. I am well aware. Now are you going to stand there gaping at me, or are you going to teach me?" Xanxus stood up from his executives chair and glanced expectantly towards the new piano.

"Ermm, ok. Just sit down; I'll go get my music"

* * *

By that afternoon, Xanxus was playing _Twinkle Twinkle Little Star_ with competence and seemed rather proud of his progress. Squalo was shocked, thoroughly shocked. His boss was not only being relatively pleasant, he was also learning without abuse, complaint or violence. It was enough to just about send Squalo over the mental-sanity cliff.

Lussuria poked his head into his boss's office.

"Boss! I brought you the new reports from….err" His voice trailed off. "Ah, boss are you playing _Twinkle Twinkle Little Star?_ That's one of my favourite songs!" Lussuria broke into an enthusiastic rendition of the nursery rhymes.

"Oi you gay retard! Shuttup!" Squalo yelled at Lussuria who was happily wailing… ahem singing.

"OUT! Get out!" Lacking a suitable object to throw, Xanxus pulled out his guns.

Lussuria left. Very quickly.

Xanxus turned to Squalo, a scowl on his face.

"Remind me why I employed him"

"That decision Boss, is one I cannot explain or comprehend. Sometimes I wonder how that man is still functioning, when he is as gay as he is." Squalo shrugged.

Xanxus's mouth crinkled at one corner; his version of amusement. He turned to Squalo, and reached one large hand up to the other man's cheek. Slowly, teasingly Xanxus brought his face closer to Squalo's, and then lunged, swiftly pressing his lips against Squalo's.

"Thankyou" The words were whispered against Squalo's tingling lips.

This was too much for Squalo. His eyes rolled back into his skull, and he promptly disappeared backwards over the back of the piano stool.


	2. Jaws

A/N: hey guys! I really did originally intend this to be a one-shot, but one of my gorgeous friends intervened. We were mucking around on a piano, and we start laughing imaging Xanxus playing the piano and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and Squalo's reaction. We have created an amazing original rock version of TTLS which worthy of Xanxy-chan-sama ;)

Then she starts playing the first bars of a piece she loves which sound remarkably like the theme song from Jaws…And we both crack up, because it's oh-so-very-fitting for someone we could mention. So that is the inspiration behind this 2nd instalment

It is dedicated to aforementioned gorgeous friend, Yuhazaki. This is for you, Bean ;) I hope you like it! *heart*

**Jaws**

_Duh duh. Duh duh. Duh duh duh duh_

"BOSS! What are you doing? It's three in the morning" the whine in Squalo's sleep-deprived, exhausted voice made Xanxus smirk.

"You told me I had to practice trash. I'm just doing what you said" Xanxus chuckled evilly to himself, mentally waiting for Squalo's very entertaining whining.

"But bosssssss I didn't say practice at three in the fucking morning!"

"Well both of us are up, aren't we? Better to be productive." Xanxus never thought he'd actually say that. He made sure his UNDERLINGS were productive; he himself was a different matter.

"VOIII I WOULDN'T BE UP ASSHOLE, IF YOU WEREN'T PLAYING GODDAMN PIANO AT THREE IN THE MORNING!"

Squalo turned on his heel and marched back into the adjoining bedroom.

_Duh duh. Duh DUH. DUH DUH DUH DUH!_

"VOIIIIII! Why the hell are you playing the Jaws theme? I didn't teach you the Jaws theme! Where the fuck did you find that?" Squalo came stomping back out of the bedroom, and grabbed the offending piece off the piano.

"I have powers beyond your minuscule imagination trash."

"Oh really? So then why does this piece have a sticky note saying "Here is the piece you wanted Bossu~~! Hearts and kisses, Lussuria" on it?"

"Shuddup. Gimme that!" Xanxus lunged for the piece of paper in his second in command's hand, and overbalanced, toppling on to the tiled floor with an 'oomph' and a loud thump.

Squalo howled. Positively howled with uncontrollable giggling whilst Xanxus glared at him whilst compiling ways to murder in the bloodiest, most painful way possible to the human imagination.

"Shark, stop laughing or I shall murder you with this music alone"

Squalo snorted "What are you going to do, paper cut me to death?"

"Yes" Xanxus's eyes showed he was dead serious. That stopped Squalo laughing immediately. He had forgotten his boss was completely agro, had no sense of humour and had a few screws loose in the sanity department. If Xanxus said he could kill by paper cut, he would kill you by paper cut. The boss didn't understand the word 'impossible'. If he said it would happen, it will happen.

Xanxus smiled. His threat had worked as it was intended *self congratulation time* That shark was unbelievably gullible. As if you could die from one or even several of those little, tiny cuts. They didn't even hurt.

But he didn't realise that his index finger was lying along the edge of the sheet music. Xanxus's finger slid across the edge of the paper. It was expensive paper- thick, creamy and stiff. A long line of blood welled and beaded along a paper cut spanning the length of Xanxus's index finger.

Xanxus frowned, then scowled then grimaced as the stinging started. He shook his hand in an annoyed fashion, trying to shake the pain away.

He was so tempted to say that weak word he would never give in the temptation. The repercussions of his shark hearing him say "ow" would be embarrassing. Especially since he'd just scoffed at how much they hurt. Instead of giving in to the evil temptation, Xanxus decided he would continue annoying his 2nd in command.

_Duh duh. Duh duuuuh. _

_Time for a new tack_ Squalo thought to himself.

"Bossu~" Squalo murmured, kneeling beside Xanxus's piano stool and leaning in close next to his ear. "Ya wanna come to bed?" He gave an experimental lick to the outside rim of his lover's ear. When he no response, only more Jaws theme, he began nibbling on Xanxus's earlobe. No reaction. _DAMN. _

_Time for the big guns_. In one fluid motion, Squalo lifted one of Xanxus's hands and slid himself around his boss's body until Squalo was sitting, back to the piano, on Xanxus's lap.

"Wanna see what the _real_ Jaws can do?" he purred, punctuating his words with a quick, hard grind of his hips.

"Trash" the cocky grin on Xanxus's face made a lot of Squalo's blood move very quickly southwards.

Xanxus held up his index finger with his paper cut with blood still welling along it. "Get me a bandaid"


End file.
